Undithe Poie

Every year during our 2  month long summer vacations when we travelled to Coorg, we would spend a lot of time hanging out at home. Life had a rhythm to it. You'd wake up really early head to the kitchen for a cup of coffee or tea, eat some delish breakfast and follow that with another cup of tea or coffee and then basically hang around reading the newspaper or take a nap or go for a walk in the estate if it's not too hot. And the day would go by precisely that  lazily. Unless, you were going out visiting other relatives. Then you'd wake up every morning and be engulfed in a rush of activities, everything would need to be done with speed so you could depart at a reasonable hour. Often when people ask me what Coorg is like I describe it to be acres of coffee estate after coffee estates one after the other - often looking like one big estate itself. Often interspersing this view are occasional paddy fields. Chances of one coming across a house or people are rare when you're driving through sometimes winding hilly roads, unless you cross a village or small town square. Most bungalows are hidden deep in the interiors - a mud or paved driveway leading up from the main road into a clearing, where you'll find a house nestled within coffee plants and dense trees, completely camouflaging it from sight. To get from our place to another relative's house was often a 1 hour long journey with a stop in the town square to buy eats and drinks for the guests.

Visiting someone's house empty handed was blasphemy. Such bad manners, that it would be spoken about for a long time after.  In my many years of visiting with my parents, this has been so deeply ingrained in me that if by some chance i am unable to arm myself with goodies and gifts while visiting someone, the guilt stays with me for a long time and i apologise to my hosts profusely. Coorg town squares are literally squares with shops on all sides - one selling vegetables, the other meats, one for fish, a few kirana stores selling dry condiments. There will invariably be a 'hotel', which are actually restaurants, selling a few coorg delicacies. This if it's a big town. If it's a small village, there usually are 2 stores at the most selling only the basic necessities for all the other "big items" like meats and fish you have to go to the bigger town. 

Now when you're travelling to visit relatives you will cross smaller shops as well as at least one big town. We'd stop there and buy a loaf of bread, a kg or two of mutton, savoury snacks and definitely a sweet - pound cake or jalebis or sohan papdi - you get the drift. Oh and maybe sometimes a bottle of liquor - but that is mostly if you're praying to an ancestor - I'll definitely write about our rituals in the future. But for this post, I'll stick to the title - undithe poie.  The one phrase I've heard a lot in my life - whether that's visiting or hosting relatives or friends is undithe poie which translates into - please stay for a meal. There is no way you'd visit someone in Coorg during a meal-time and they wouldn't ask you to stay for the meal - god forbid if they let you go, the lament on the way back in the car would be truly real. You expected it so much, that that was the reason you'd purchased the meat on the way in the first place. This hospitality wasn't a show or something on the surface, there are times when the first undithe poie extends to the second invite for "undithe poie" - and sometimes these invites also get accepted - I've stood at either ends of those invites - hosting and staying on for another instalment, usually dinner and usually preceded by drinks and snacks as well. Those are some of my favourite memories of vacationing in Coorg. 

But this experience is not limited to vacations - for those staying in Coorg, visiting relatives and close friends is a recurring ritual - this form of social connect keeps folks going in an otherwise solitary lifestyle. Every estate is far away from the other - so the concept of a neighbour is also different from an urban apartment building where you invariably bump into each other in your daily lives. In Coorg, your neighbour might lives anywhere from 5-10 km from you and your estate. So bumping into each other is slightly tough. Hence visiting is an activity, and one that is taken seriously. Calls are made at least a day in advance to give the other family time to prepare for your arrival and plan their schedules accordingly, you decide what clothes to wear - and they are taken out a night before and ironed and places carefully in the dressing room - all prep carried out the night before, for who knows how hectic the next day will be. It is a process. One that I can now launch into without thought the minute confirmations are sent across. 

Similarly, if you received a phone call asking if the family was available to host a visit, you'd start prepping the house, check for groceries, marinate the meats and the next morning the cleaning frenzy would begin. And this time you'd be the one saying "undithe poie". Some of my moms' stories involve she and her many cousins getting together at her grandmother's house for summer vacations - imagine the scene, 12-15 children all between the ages of 5-13 running around, having meals together, chasing cows in the paddy field, climbing trees etc - and also eating together.  The kodava hospitality extends to more than just one meal.

Even today when i visit my parents and they are hosting people hearing them saying "undithe poie" on the telephone or in person to the guests fills my heart with joy, because I knew good food was to follow - but also because every time that phase is uttered, a tradition that is so much a part of my upbringing and culture jumps forth and I feel an instant connection and a need to take it further.

My next post is going to be one of my favourite vegetable curries from coorg - avare curry. Avare or hyacinth beans are broad beans found in many cuisines across karnataka and i particularly love my grandmom's (now mom's) recipe for a coconut based gravy. God forbid if you were stuck without any meat for whatever reason and you were hosting guests - this dish would occupy a place of pride on your table - trying to make up for the lack of meat. The picture above is avare being sold in the Thursday santhe (market) my parents go to. While, I can not host folks for dinner on this blog, with the next recipe i would like to say : undithe poie